Explaining your anxiety to someone who understand it can be difficult and challenging. I think the best way to illustrate anxiety is with examples. Sharing your experiences of anxiety with others not only helps them understand and recognize your anxiety but enables them to better support you. The support of friends and family can significantly contribute to the success of your recovery or treatment of a mental illness like anxiety.
Through this article, I will talk about anxiety with examples or analogies that have helped me better understand it. I hope you find these examples simple to understand so you'll be able to explain them to others.
🔹What is Anxiety?
Anxiety is an emotion characterized by feelings of tension, worry, and fear. At least that’s what it is defined as. But let me explain what that really means.Anxiety can be described as an ‘Internal smoke detector’. But instead of warning you of only smoke, it warns you of any perceived threats. This “alarm” warns us of any approaching danger so we can protect ourselves.However, if a smoke detector isn’t calibrated correctly, steam from a shower might falsely trigger the alarm. Similarly, your anxiety may be perceiving danger where none exists.Once the smoke detector gets triggered, it keeps going until you turn it off. In terms of anxiety, it keeps on going until the threat is relieved, disrupted, or eventually goes away on its own.
🔹Where Does Anxiety Come From?
Now that you understand anxiety is like a smoke detector that alerts you of any perceived danger. You are probably wondering why does it happen and where does it come from? Anxiety is an evolutionary trait that helps protect us from danger. Let’s look at an example:
A Deer lives in an Immediate-Return Environment which means your actions instantly deliver clear and immediate outcomes.
For e.g.- the Deer feels hungry > worries about hunger > searches for food > the worry is relieved.
However, we humans live in a Delayed Return Environment which means the choices you make today will not benefit you immediately.
For e.g.- Getting a good education today could lead to a better career in the future.
The problem with this is that your worries are not relieved immediately. Our brains are not designed to solve problems in a Delayed Return Environment. This leads to chronic stress and anxiety about perceived threats that are not actual dangers.
🔹What Anxiety Feels Like?
When explaining your anxiety to someone, it is important to share what and how you feel. Since anxiety is unique to everyone there is no single explanation for this, here are a few ways to describe anxiety to someone.
Here are some common examples of how anxiety feels like:
- It feels like you’re trapped in a loop. You feel the constant back and forth of opposing sensations and emotions. Everything you instinctively try to do to relieve it works against you makes you feel stuck in that cycle.
- You feel overwhelmed and want to run away from everything. You feel restless and agitated, maybe you have trouble sleeping. It is feeling like a constant tug-of-war with yourself and you just want to escape it all.
- When under mental distress, it’s difficult to think straight and make rational decisions. The extreme stress and anxiety can cause your brain to shut down and make it difficult to focus, be productive, and perform normal daily tasks.
- Feels like you have no control over your anxiety. Anxiety isn’t a choice and the negative thoughts, reactions, and symptoms you experience cannot be controlled. They are habitual, automatic, and fleeting.
- Can feel like everyone is staring and judging you. You experience feelings of humiliation or embarrassment because you are exposed to judgment, scrutiny, or rejection.
- Constantly being pushed underwater. Anxiety can feel like you are drowning and every time you come up for air it only gives a moment of relief until being thrown back under by another wave.
- A battle between me, myself, and I. The logical side of your brain realizes what you are thinking or feeling is irrational, but the anxiety takes over with a constant state of panic or self-doubt.
- It can be physically paralyzing. Anxiety can prevent you from saying or doing something no matter how much you try and force it. It feels like a heavyweight on your chest and can be disabling.
- Every thought becomes the worst-case scenario. You can’t stop excessively worrying about everything. This causes you to only think in extremes and your worries irrationally spiral out of control.
🔹What Other People Think Anxiety is Like ?
Anxiety can be difficult to understand which gives others a negative misconception of the illness. Here are some of the most common myths about anxiety:
- Anxiety Will Go Away on Its Own-
Anxiety symptoms are persistent and will get worse if ignored. The severity of symptoms can fluctuate throughout a person's life based on different situations or stages in their life.However, this does not mean it is no longer an anxiety disorder. Anxiety disorders are chronic and persistent and if not treated properly, symptoms are likely to return.
- Anxiety isn’t that Common-
Overall prevalence of Anxiety disorders in the Indian adult population was found to be 2.57%.
- Dismissed as Negative Stereotypes-
It is common for people to dismiss anxiety and think it is just laziness, overreacting, it’s all in your head, being too sensitive or emotional, or seeking attention.These negative stereotypes cause people with anxiety to feel more alone which makes it difficult to share their struggles with others.
- Just Stop Worrying-
If it was as simple as just stop worrying, no one would have an anxiety disorder. It is very difficult to overcome an anxiety disorder without help. There is no magic wand that you can use to just snap out of it or stop worrying.Overcoming anxiety takes time and effort to challenge irrational thoughts and behaviors so you can reframe those thoughts more rationally.
- Just Avoid Stressful or Anxious Situations-
Anxiety can be triggered by normal day-to-day situations or objects. It can be unrealistic to avoid those stressful situations or objects entirely.Even if it was possible, it would not help the situation. Avoidance only adds fuel to anxiety and can make it worse over time.
- Social Anxiety is the same as being Introverted or Shy-
Introversion, shyness, and social anxiety are actually different and have their own unique characteristics. Introversion is social energy and how someone recharges by being alone where shyness is nervousness or discomfort caused by social interactions.Social anxiety on the other hand is an anxiety disorder caused by fear or apprehension of social interactions or performance situations.
- Caused by Childhood Problems-
While childhood or developmental problems can be the cause of anxiety for some people it isn’t for everyone. Many people who experience a positive childhood can develop anxiety as an adult.
- Symptoms are Only Mental-
Anxiety isn’t just negative thoughts, emotions, and behaviours. You can experience physical symptoms such as sweating, nausea, racing heart rate, insomnia, and stomach pains.
- A Sign of Personal Weakness-
Anxiety doesn’t discriminate and affects people of all ages. Anxiety is a distressing mental illness that can cause both mental and physical symptoms.These symptoms can take a toll and make it difficult to focus and be productive, make you feel fatigued, and makes you more at risk of a physical illness.
- Peace and Quiet is Calming-
While it can be nice to get away from everything and have some alone time, this usually doesn’t solve your anxiety.Your anxiety stems from overthinking anxious thoughts. These worries can spiral out of control when you are alone and feeling isolated.
Hi ! I am Kanishka a practicing Clinical and Forensic Psychologist . I provide therapy services to individuals who have been diagnosed with Mental health issues . For more Information do check out the FAQS section of our website. Looking forward to helping you Heal, Nourish and Thrive !
Feel free to reach out to me.
author : Kanishka
Clinical and Forensic Psychologist .