Even when we know, intellectually, that we deserve care, rest, and kindness, those ideas can feel out of reach in the middle of a stressful day or an anxious season. When life speeds up whether you’re anticipating a big event, moving through uncertainty, or simply juggling more than usual the nervous system often kicks into survival mode. Your mind might spin stories like: “I’m falling behind,” “I can’t afford to slow down,” “I should be doing more.” These thoughts can feel urgent, persuasive, even factual. But they’re often just stress speaking. That’s why I’ve been leaning into a series of simple, clinically informed reminders small truths backed by both research and lived experience. These are things I come back to when I’m overwhelmed or unsteady. You don’t have to take in all of them. But maybe one will land at just the right time, reminding you that you’re already doing more than enough.
1. Grounding happens in the smallest moments
We often think of grounding as something we have to set aside time for a long meditation, a yoga class, a digital detox. But grounding is actually most powerful in the in-between moments. One deep breath while your page is loading. Pressing your feet to the ground while on a call. Even just pausing to notice your surroundings can bring you back to your body and regulate your stress response. Mindfulness-based interventions have consistently shown that even brief moments of attention to the present can reduce rumination, anxiety, and physiological reactivity (Kabat-Zinn, 1994). We don't have to wait for the perfect setting to feel steady. Grounding is always available in the now.
2. Rest is not a reward it’s essential nourishment
You wouldn’t wait to “deserve” food. You eat because your body needs fuel. Similarly, rest is not something you earn by being productive enough it’s something you need in order to stay well. In occupational and clinical psychology, rest is recognized as a foundational part of emotional regulation, executive functioning, and resilience (Maslach & Leiter, 2016). Reframing rest as a biological need rather than a productivity loophole can help dismantle internalized guilt about slowing down. You don’t have to crash before you take a break.
3. What if this is already enough?
The inner critic has a way of convincing us that we’re always behind. That we should be doing more, faster, better. But this narrative is often rooted in distorted thinking especially all-or-nothing beliefs or catastrophizing (Beck, 1976). Clinical work on psychological flexibility shows that well-being is more about how we relate to ourselves in difficulty than how much we achieve (Hayes et al., 1999). So I’ve been asking: What if what I’m able to do today while still caring for myself is exactly the right amount? That kind of enoughness can’t be measured by external standards. It’s felt, moment to moment, in the way you speak to yourself when things are hard.
4. You can care without carrying everything
Many of us especially those in helping roles or with high empathy struggle with emotional over-responsibility. We want to fix things, carry burdens, keep everyone around us okay. But this can lead to compassion fatigue and burnout (Figley, 1995).Healthy boundaries allow us to show up without absorbing everything. You can witness someone’s pain without becoming consumed by it. You can be deeply supportive without abandoning yourself. And when you feel the pull to carry it all, it’s okay to pause and ask: What part of this is truly mine to hold?
5. Comforting rituals are acts of regulation, not indulgence
When you feel lost, overwhelmed, or overstimulated, returning to simple rituals can be powerfully grounding. Lighting a candle. Making tea. Journaling for five minutes. Playing familiar music while you clean. These aren’t just habits they’re forms of emotional self-regulation.Rituals give the brain a sense of predictability, which calms the nervous system and restores internal order (Fiese et al., 2002). Especially in an age of constant alerts and fast dopamine, these slow, intentional practices help you feel connected to yourself in a deeper way.
6. People are thinking about you far less than you fear
Social anxiety often stems from a distorted perception that everyone is closely watching or judging us. Psychologists call this the “spotlight effect” the tendency to overestimate how much others notice us (Gilovich et al., 2000).The truth? Most people are too preoccupied with their own lives to dwell on yours. And even if someone does judge, that judgment says more about their lens than your worth. The more you practice living in alignment with your own values not other people’s imagined opinions the freer you become.
7. A fleeting feeling doesn’t define your future
When we’re in distress, emotions can hijack logic. Feeling anxious might convince you that something’s wrong. Feeling unmotivated can spiral into “Do I need to start everything over?” But emotions, while real and valid, are not always accurate indicators of long-term truth.Dialectical Behavior Therapy teaches us that emotions are waves meant to rise and pass, not be clung to or avoided (Linehan, 1993). Learning to observe rather than fuse with emotion allows us to make decisions based on values, not momentary fear.
8. “Good enough” is more than good - it’s brave.
Perfectionism often hides behind productivity, but its root is fear: fear of failure, judgment, inadequacy. The cost of perfectionism? Procrastination, avoidance, burnout (Flett & Hewitt, 2002). Ironically, the more we chase flawlessness, the less we actually create. Letting yourself be “good enough” doesn’t mean lowering your standards it means respecting your limits and trusting your process. Your version of “just okay” might actually be incredibly meaningful to someone else.
9. You don’t need certainty to take the next step
We often wait to feel ready before beginning before launching the project, taking the job, speaking our truth. But research on behavioral activation suggests that taking action, even in uncertainty, can itself create clarity (Jacobson et al., 1996). You don’t have to know the five-year plan to move forward. Often, the only way to find out what fits is to try something on. The next step doesn’t have to be permanent it just has to be honest.
10. Boredom can mean you’re safe and that’s a gift
In our hyperconnected world, we often interpret stillness or boredom as failure. But boredom is only possible when the body isn’t in threat mode. It’s a sign your nervous system feels safe enough to disengage (Van den Bergh et al., 2022). It creates the spaciousness needed for reflection, creativity, and nervous system repair. Instead of fearing boredom, what if we welcomed it? What if we let silence speak, rather than rushing to fill it? Boredom isn’t stagnation it’s often the doorway to clarity.
A Final Note
These reminders aren’t prescriptions. They’re invitations to slow down, soften self-judgment, and make space for something quieter than your inner critic. In the end, mental health is not a checklist it’s a practice.
You’re allowed to be a work in progress and still be worthy of rest. You’re allowed to move forward even if you’re unsure. You’re allowed to be imperfect and still deeply needed.
Wherever you are right now: breathe. You’re doing more than enough.
— Mental Health with Kanishka
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author : Kanishka
Clinical and Forensic Psychologist .